I wouldn't want her any other way

Artist Song Buy
The Miracles  You've Really Got a Hold on Me   buy on itunes
The Beatles  We Can Work It Out   buy on itunes
Grant Hart  You Don't Have to Tell Me Now   buy on itunes
The Costello Show  Indoor Fireworks   buy on itunes
The Magnetic Fields  All My Little Words   buy on itunes
Otis Redding  My Lover's Prayer   buy on itunes
Galaxie 500  Sorry   buy on itunes
The Go-Betweens  Apology Accepted   buy on itunes
The Mountain Goats  Alpha in Tauris   buy on itunes
Aztec Camera  We Could Send Letters  buy on itunes
Fleetwood Mac  Silver Springs   buy on itunes
Neil Young  Birds   buy on itunes
Dusty Springfield  I Just Don't Know What to Do with Myself   buy on itunes
The White Stripes  Forever for Her (Is Over for Me)   buy on itunes
Lloyd Cole & the Commotions  2cv   buy on itunes
Richard Thompson  Beeswing   buy on itunes
Johnny Cash  I Tremble for You   buy on itunes
Antony & the Johnsons  Hope There's Someone   buy on itunes
George Jones  He Stopped Loving Her Today   buy on itunes
Morrissey  Will Never Marry   buy on itunes
The Velvet Underground  I'm Set Free   buy on itunes
Descendents  Coolidge   buy on itunes
The Kinks  Days   buy on itunes

Comment:

"R.I.P. Jen G. & Rob C.--9/1/02-6/25/05." I feel uncomfortable exposing this much of myself here, but I'm hoping that it'll be therapeutic. I made this mix eight days ago and have held back the urge to post it, hoping that we really could work through our differences and go on to a happy life together. However, I have a pretty strong feeling that the reality of the situation is quite different. After eight months of premature endings, Jen and I have broken up. It's the closest I've come to a divorce, since we've been living together for all but six months of our relationship. Needless to say, I'm filled with every kind of contradictory emotion, mostly because we're trying to reconcile our decision with ourselves while I'm looking for a new place to live. Sadly enough, when she listened to this last week, all she could say was, "Thanks for trying to make me feel as bad as you do." Some track notes: 1) Our theme song for at least the past eight months, if not the past fourteen months. 2) I originally had Sebadoh's "Soul & Fire" in this slot, but (probably incorrectly) thought that it was too pessimistic. 3) A song about denial, of sorts, in which Grant pleads with his lover to not ruin a tender moment by discussing the bleak emotional undercurrent going on between them. 4) I don't think anyone has ever written a more accurate analysis of a broken relationship. 5) This is one of the songs here that chokes me up, especially because I've played & sung it to her in so many different circumstances. "You said you were in love with me/Both of us know that that's impossible/and I could make you rue the day/but I could never make you stay." 6) The emotional flipside of "We Can Work It Out"--Otis is pleading with her to just "talk it over"; I understand that situation. 7) When I played this song at my last acoustic show, she wept. 8) "I used to say dumb things/I guess I still do...." 9) "We're pictures of decency/when we wave goodbye outside/Yeah I'm the model of composure out there/but you oughta see me shaking later on." 10) When I told Jen that I probably wouldn't be speaking to her much, if at all, if I were forced to move out (only because I don't need to be reminded of how much I still love her), she suggested that we at least send e-mails to keep in touch (despite the fact that I'll most likely be living within three miles of her); I immediately thought of this song. 11) One of the most important songs here: "Don't say that she's pretty/Did you say that she loves you?/Baby, I don't want to know" and "Can you tell me was it worth it?/Baby I don't want to know" will almost certainly be my exact thoughts after I leave. 12) Even the sound of the opening piano chord sends chills down my spine. 13) Jen and I have done almost *everything* together since we became an item and my entire life plan was based upon the premise that she'd be a part of it. It reminds me of the line from the Pogues' "Fairytale of New York" ("I kept [your dreams] with me, babe/I put them with my own/Can't make it all alone/I've built my dreams around you"). 14) I knew there was a reason that this was my favorite song on the new album. 15) "She took her mother's car to get away from me/Heaven knows that I can sympathize." 16) Jen's not self-destructive like RT's heroine, but she's got a willful side to her that's both her most appealing and her most frustrating trait. I'd still take the negative aspects of her willfulness over living without her. 17) Self-explanatory. 18) My deepest fear. 19) In some ways the key song on this mix, as it makes me blubber like a baby every time I hear it. 20) This is from her perspective, although the title summarizes my lot in life, I think. 21) "I'm set free to find a new illusion." 22) A pep-talk song that's helped me through prior break-ups. 23) The obvious, achingly bittersweet conclusion. Please try not to be too hard on me for my mawkishness. Title from R. Thompson.

Feedback:

gravatar
James Jackson
Date: 7/5/2005
Sorry to hear of your break-up. Hope the mix is as cathartic to listen to as if likely was to make.
gravatar
Dead Man
Date: 7/5/2005
Sorry to hear the bad news, Rob. I hope things will be going better for you in the coming days.
gravatar
Media Vixen: Radio Sally
Date: 7/5/2005
Beautiful. Painful. Beautiful. Painful. And did I mention OUCH.
gravatar
Sean Lally
Date: 7/5/2005
Bummer, boy-o. Talk to you soon.
gravatar
Moe
Date: 7/5/2005
I'm never happy to see a break-up mix on this site, especially when it's from someone I've gotten to know over the years. Just keep your chin up and hopefully everything will turn out fine.
gravatar
lo-fi jr.
Date: 7/5/2005
Don't quite know what to say, Rob. The mix alone is clearly a highly personal stunner & your notes make it all that much sadder. Hope things get much better quick. I'll talk to you soon.
gravatar
Pop Kulcher
Date: 7/6/2005
Geez, man, that's really sad to hear. I was hoping that the absence of news on this front was a good thing, but alas... And for anyone foolish enough to doubt that you are among the most musically-inclined souls around, your willingness to share your private side with everyone in the guise of a mix tape says it all. Can't claim to know what you're going through (having avoided most adult relationship/dating issues by marrying the woman I met the first week of college), but hope you find your way through it all.
gravatar
Mo Twang!
Date: 7/6/2005
A beautiful mix, but I'm sorry things didn't work out for you.
gravatar
sport !
Date: 7/6/2005
Everything WILL be fine, just hang in there. Makes for an OUTSTANDING mix, however.
gravatar
Siobhan
Date: 7/6/2005
Really sorry to hear about this, Rob. As has already been said, this is a stunning mix, but it's just such a shame that you're having to go through this in order to make it. And like Moe, I'm never happy to see a break-up mix - but (as trite as it sounds at the minute), things will start to get better, hopefully sooner rather than later. Meanwhile keep up the wonderful mixing, if it helps you.
gravatar
Salman1
Date: 7/6/2005
Rally nice. I hope everything works out for the best.
gravatar
buglady
Date: 7/6/2005
Wow. I am so sorry to hear about Jen, and stunned by the mix. I'll write soon.
gravatar
bufo alvarius
Date: 7/6/2005
Jesus, Rob. Like everybody else, I am sorry to hear about this. Don't know quite what else to say right now. Great sadness often brings about great art. An amazing mix.
gravatar
mckbrd
Date: 7/6/2005
what a mix Rob! sorry to hear about the relationship. although it happens to us all sooner or later, moving on and building on what you've learned is always the next best step.......
gravatar
hemizen
Date: 7/6/2005
Our thoughts are with you Rob.
gravatar
Dom1
Date: 7/6/2005
Ditto Mr. Jackson!
gravatar
Professor Poserlad
Date: 7/7/2005
i'm sorry dude. remember the words of aeschylus as repeated by RFK, "And even in our sleep pain that cannot forget falls drop by drop upon the heart,
and in our own despair, against our will, comes wisdom to us by the awful grace of God." Good luck with things.
gravatar
G-Sphere
Date: 7/11/2005
Wonderful mix Rob. Sorry about the source of inspiration.
gravatar
Josh Krauter1
Date: 7/11/2005
Good stuff.
gravatar
p the swede
Date: 7/16/2005
well. here comes another one in despair,I feel sorry for ya Rob but I know after the last year what hell is, see you on round the corner soon
gravatar
Wow, sorry to hear about this. Needless to say, I can relate all too well with many of your comments. Musically speaking, I totally agree about "Indoor Fireworks." Both that and "I'm Set Free" were included on my break-up mix last year, where I went through much the same thing you're going through now. A year and four months later, it still hurts a bit, but not nearly as much as the intense pain I was enduring for most of last year. Time does heal all wounds. Oh, and I'm also beginning to think track 20 is my lot in life as well.
gravatar
NobodyNowhere
Date: 8/16/2005
Rob, thanks for the comments on my mix, man. It should go without saying that if you're not THE king of this site, then you're definitely right the hell up there, so it's great when you notice one of mine. That said, this mix is right in line what I'm going through (in fact, 5 or 6 of the songs were to be on my next mix, but now I feel like I'll be cribbing). Here's to you, and hoping things start sunnying the fuck up.

You must be logged in to do this.