Artist	Song
Andrew W.K.	Party Hard
Eddie Murphy	Party All the Time
Andrew W.K.	Party Hard
Komeda	Boogie Woogie/Rock n'Roll
Andrew W.K.	Party Hard
The Dismemberment Plan	That's When the Party Started
Andrew W.K.	Party Hard
Pink	Get the Party Started
Andrew W.K.	Party Hard
Andrew W.K.	Party til You Puke
Andrew W.K.	Party Hard
Pulp	Party Hard
Andrew W.K.	Party Hard
Beastie Boys	Fight for Your Right (to Party)

Comment:

Match 1 - A.W.K. easily dispatches Murphy in the opening seconds of the first round. Barely even a contest.
Match 2 - Initially, Komeda is able to dodge A.W.K's sledgehammer riffs, bobbing, weaving and pogoing around the ring while egging W.K. on with endless refrains of "There's a pah-pah-pah-pah-pahty
going on". W.K. counterpunches late in the third round with a fierce "WE DO WHAT WE LIKE AND WE LIKE WHAT WE DO!!!!". Komeda goes down in the 4th.

Match 3 - The D Plan doesn't even make it through the first chorus. A.W.K. looks pretty unbeatable at this point. He stops just short of actually dismembering the Plan.

Match 4 - A.W.K. meets with his first genuine resistance. Pink's hooks are nearly the equals of W.K.'s, and for awhile the outcome is in question. Goes 12 rounds, judges in favor of W.K., but just barely.

Match 5 - The bizarre doppelganger match. W.K. vs. W.K. This is where he suffers the blow to the nose. Blood flies everywhere. Much fist pumping and headbanging. Logistics win out...you must party hard if you want to puke.

Match 6 - Contrary to appearances, Jarvis Cocker is quite the formibable opponent. He survives well into the sixth round, easily dodging W.K.'s clumsy jabs and countering with scathing wit and erudition. Eventually, all those years of cigarettes, booze and sex have worn down the endurance of the once mighty Cocker. Goes down in a heap in round ten.

Match 7 - Championship Bout. (Hey, I know I'm gonna get shit for this, but I'm just the reporter, remember that). The Battle Royal at the Grand Royal.
The Beasties are primed and pumped for this one. They show no signs of being ready to relinquish their crown any time to soon, especially to some greasy young moronic upstart like A.W.K. Yet, having remaind the undisputed champs for over twelve years, their complacency starts to look like it may be their undoing, as W.K. shows no signs of letting up at all, no matter how many times you bloody his nose. He is relentless and apparently inexhaustible. This one goes the full 12. The judges' deliberation is excruciatingly drawn out. The anticipation in the arena is palpable and portends imminent danger. The crowd teeters on the edge of a riot. The referee steps to the mike. And the winner is...

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