"Matador Records, Your Ass Is Mine" : Six Labels Battle It Out In a Steel Cage!

Artist Song
New Pornographers (MATADOR)  Miss Teen Wordpower 
Elvis Costello (STIFF)  Less Than Zero 
Elf Power (ELEPHANT 6)  Temporary Arm 
Rev. Horton Heat (SUB POP)  Bales of Cocaine 
Pixies (4AD)  Debaser 
Bright Eyes (SADDLE CREEK)  One Foot In Front of the Other 
Guided By Voices (MATADOR)  Official Ironmen Rally Song 
Graham Parker (STIFF)  Mercury Poisoning 
Neutral Milk Hotel (ELEPHANT 6)  Bucket 
Scud Mountain Boys (SUB POP)  Penthouse in the Woods 
Cocteau Twins (4AD)  Ivo 
The Faint (SADDLE CREEK)  Let the Poison Spill From Your Throat 
Pavement (MATADOR)  Shady Lane 
Richard Hell and the Voidoids (STIFF)  Blank Generation 
Olivia Tremor Control (ELEPHANT 6)  I'm Not Feeling Human 
The Dwarves (SUB POP)  Drug Store 
Red House Painters (4AD)  Summer Dress 
Sorry About Dresden (SADDLE CREEK)  Beds and Lawns 

Comment:

Is Elephant 6 an actual label or just a "collective?"Two Tone: "Hey, you guys, I wanna play too!"SubPop: "Piss off, neo-ska sissy-boy."4AD: "Be nice, SubPop."SubPop: *pummels 4AD*4AD: *dies*SubPop: *accidentally knocks skinny emo kid Conor Oberst over*Saddle Creek: *dies*Elephant 6: *sees what SubPop does to skinny indie kids, runs away*Matador: *lands one good punch*SubPop: "But . . . Pavement . . . broke . . . up!" *dies*Matador: "Yeah. But Soundgarden sold out."Matador Wins! Party at Ira Kaplan's!

Feedback:

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watchingyoucry
Date: 9/1/2003
GREAT!
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alphabomber2112
Date: 9/1/2003
lmao this is great stuff
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Android
Date: 9/1/2003
Cool, man.
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mat8drb
Date: 9/1/2003
now that's class. pure class.
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mad girl's love song
Date: 9/1/2003
i knew matador would win.
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Geoffrey Holland
Date: 9/1/2003
cool..but I gotta think that Stiff would kick any of these other pansies asses!
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jab
Date: 9/2/2003
fucking wonderful. conor versus malkmus in the steel cage, and i hear ben gibbard will be the special referee. awesome.